Do you ever?
by Akiko Natsuko
Summary: Oneshot. In the aftermath of their adventure in Edolas, Lucy questions which version of herself is the best for Fairy Tail only to find that it's Natsu who has the answers.


Disclaimer: As always Fairy Tail and its characters don't belong to me I'm just borrowing them.

FTFT

After the shock of Lisanna's return had begun to sink in the atmosphere had taken on a festive edge as the entire guild prepared to party well in to the night, after all how often was it that a dead nakama came back to life?

Whilst everyone else had been preparing for what promised to be one hell of a party Natsu had filled Makarov in on everything that happened in Edolas, leaving the old man to wonder just how his brats managed to wind up in such situations at every turn. Still he was unable to hide the pride in his voice as he congratulated the fire mage and his companions on their efforts, and thanking them for once more protecting the guild – even if the guild had been unaware of the danger it was in. There was a moment of sadness in learning that Mystogan had left the guild, but at least it came with the knowledge that he was moving on and taking up a new…or old life…even if it was in another word.

Seeing the overwhelming joy in the dragon-slayer's eyes as his gaze drifted to where Lisanna was stood with her family he quickly let Natsu go. He had been one of the few that Natsu had actually shown his sorrow around when she'd 'died', and there had been moments when he thought that that the hot-headed teen would not recover from the loss. Makarov's gaze shifted to the newly reunited family and smiled as he watched Natsu bound across to join them, being welcomed with warm smiles and hugs from the girls and a manly clap on the back from Elfman.

Whilst Lisanna had been his closest friend, born from her willingness to believe he had been raised by Dragon before the rest of his brat had realised the truth of his words, he knew Natsu was just as close now with her older siblings. It had been Natsu that had eventually got the pair to confront the wall that they had built between each other as a result of their guilt and grief, and their gradual recovery had helped the fire mage overcome his own grief.

FTFT

The party had been underway for a couple of hours, with everyone stopping by to congratulate the Strauss family on their reunion and to welcome Lisanna back personally. The rest of the group that had been aware of the events in Edolas were busy entertaining their guild mates with tales of their alternate, Edo-selves, with much ribbing over the more ridiculous differences (namely Natsu and Cana – much to the Earthland versions' consternation and irritation).

However, for Lucy the comparisons between themselves and their Edolas counterparts was proving a painful topic and she shied away when everyone tried to pull her into the discussion, even if it wasn't about her own alternate version. Slinking back against the wall, she found herself gazing around and looking at her nakama as though seeing them for the first time. Perhaps it was because she had met their counterparts, but she found herself appreciating them even more, right down to their more annoying traits (she was watching Natsu at this point as he launched a flaming fist at Gray with a loud challenge on his lips).

With the ease of long practice she ducked out of the path of a flying bottle, sighing as the rest of the guild got pulled into the brawl between Gray and Natsu. After several moments of blankly watching the brawl she straightened with a sigh, for once not feeling like partying, not even from the safety of the side lines. Besides she wanted to think, and the noise in the guild was not helping in that endeavour so she cautiously set off across the hall, easily dodging the airborne items and fists. It was with a sense of relief that she reached the door, slipping out of it without a whisper.

FT

Natsu frowned as he watched Lucy slip quietly out of one of the side doors, her expression pensive as she paused for a moment to gaze back at the partying guild before disappearing outside into the night. Without even thinking about it he quickly set aside his drink and got to his feet, nimbly ducking the drunken punch that Gray sent his way and ignoring the startled looks that went his way as he failed to retaliate. Dodging the spreading bar fights and drunken revellers he made his way as quickly as he could to the doors and slipped out into the cool night air, unaware of the eyes watching him go.

FT

"Where did Lucy-san go?" Wendy asked as she took shelter besides Erza and the Exceeds at a table near the bar, glancing around in search of the Celestial mage, surprised that the older girl hadn't also sought refuge at this table as she always tried to avoid the more boisterous side of the Guild's parties.

"She slipped out a moment ago," Carla said and Wendy glanced at her partner in surprise, although by no means a wild partier it was unusual for Lucy to sit out of guild festivities. "She looked as though something was bothering her though." The Exceed added with an air of concern and Wendy's surprised expression morphed into one of anxiety as she turned to look at Erza in quiet alarm.

"Perhaps we should go look for her?" The dragon-slayer asked worriedly not liking the idea of Lucy being alone whilst everyone else was celebrating, and there was a question in her eyes as she stared at the older girl. There was slight worry in Erza's eyes, but the re-quip mage just smiled and shook her head in response to Wendy's question before pointing to door where they could see Natsu quietly slipping out a small frown adorning his face.

"Natsu's already on it," she said with a fond smile, knowing that Natsu despite his frequent bouts of blockheadedness was probably the best one to cheer up the celestial mage. Wendy nodded after a moment's consideration, recalling all the times Lucy and Natsu had saved each other; their whole team was exceptionally close but the bond between the Celestial and Fire mages was even stronger. She just hoped that they would be able to resolve whatever was upsetting Lucy and re-join the party before it ended, after all Fairy Tail was never more alive than when it was celebrating and she knew they would regret missing the party at a later date.

FTFT

"Why are you hiding out here alone?" Natsu asked softly as he stepped outside, pulling up short as he found Lucy sat huddled up on the steps having expected to have to chase after her. She was sat with her face tilted up towards the stars and a melancholy expression on her face, her eyes missing their usual brightness. Something in his heart clenched at the sight and he frowned, unsure of what was bothering him but knowing that he wanted to wipe that expression away…Lucy should only ever be smiling.

"Just thinking," she replied quietly as she glanced up at him, surprised that he had followed her out as they were celebrating the return of his childhood best friend. However, he seemed to be in no rush to return to the party as he silently moved across and sat down beside her, scooting closer as he noticed her shivering slightly. Slowly he wrapped an arm around her and she instinctively leaned into the warmth, one hand creeping up to grasp his vest as though to anchor him and stop him running away.

"About?" He prodded gently once she was settled and she sighed turning her gaze back up to the sky, absently wondering how everything could look so normal when only hours before an Anima had filled the sky. It was made even stranger by the fact that no one outside of their team remembered all that had happened, and if it wasn't for the fact that her body still bored the scrapes and bruises from their various battles and Lisanna's miraculous return she would have been inclined to pass it off as a dream.

"Do you ever wish I was more like the Edo-Lucy?" She asked eventually sensing that his gaze hadn't wavered and she heard a sharp intake of breath as her question registered, and slowly she turned to look at him, meeting his gaze nervously.

"I told you before didn't I?" He asked, his gaze turning fierce as he stared into her eyes and she waited uncertainly, startled by the sheer emotion in his voice. "You're Lucy of Fairy Tail! We don't need or want any other Lucy, the one we have already is the only one we'll ever want!" His voice had risen towards the end and she was surprised to see tears prickling the corners of his eyes as he shot to his feet, his hands clenching at his sides as he stood over her.

"Natsu…" She trailed off unsure of what to say, she'd never expected him to react so emotionally to her question and she wondered why it had set him off in such a way.

"Why?" His voice was softer now, but the tenseness in his body remained and she knew that the control was a façade only. "Why would you ask that?"

"She… She was so different from me," Lucy said quietly carefully staring at her feet. "Despite everything that was going on Edolas, and the fact that she was responsible for keeping Fairy Tail together and safe she was always brave and strong. I don't think I could've been," she added her voice dropping off to nearly a whisper, but she knew that he would be able to hear it regardless with his hearing.

For a long moment there was silence, and worried she cautiously raised her head her to look at him, blinking as she found him staring at her with disbelieving eyes. She swallowed hard at the intensity of his gaze, but found herself unable to look away, wanting to hear his response just as much as she feared it.

"Brave? Strong?" Natsu asked incredulously when he eventually managed to find his voice, and she shifted uncomfortably under his disbelieving stare for a moment before he sighed and looked away for a moment. "You don't see it do you? How strong you are?" He asked quietly and a sad smile replaced his look of surprise as she stared wide-eyed at him, disbelief radiating from her expression.

"But I'm…" She whispered, she couldn't understand his reaction, surely he could see how weak she was especially in comparison to the rest of their team. Edo-Lucy had been so strong, holding her guild together and convincing them to act in the face of their fear and holding it together when what they feared the most happened. She wasn't sure that she could have done that, and the realisation that Edolas was essentially a reversal of Earthland had forced her to see just how weak she was.

"You are brave," Natsu said softly and now he dropped down into a crouch in front of her, reaching out to grasp her shoulders and for a brief moment she held her breath, half expecting him to shake her or something ridiculous like that. Instead his fingers curled slightly as he squeezed gently, and she realised he was just making sure she was paying attention. Blinking she raised her eyes to meet his, stunned by the warmth in the olive orbs. "If you weren't brave you would never have provoked Gajeel when he'd kidnapped you. You were weaponless and you had no idea if we could get to you in time, but you still took the risk."

_But that was stubbornness…_she thought to herself as her mind drifted back to that memory, her body aching in memory as she recalled the pain of the beating she'd received. She had so nearly caved at that time, unused to such pain even after all the jobs and scrapes they had gotten into before that. However, the way the Iron Dragon Slayer had mocked her, had mocked Reedus and the rest of her nakama had made her hold out despite the pain.

"Or what about when you dragged yourself to the lacrima inside the Nirvana, despite being injured and magically exhausted especially when you had no idea if Zero was there or not," Natsu continued, not giving her the opportunity to protest his words and relieved to see that she was actually considering what he was saying – although her eyes told him that she wasn't convinced yet, which was fine because he had plenty of evidence to counter her words.

"How did you…?" She asked, horrified that he knew how stupid she had acted back then – she had been so relieved when the whole episode had ended in a victory that she had pushed it to the back of the mind. But she knew that if it hadn't been for Gemini choosing to help her there was a good chance it would have ended differently and it would've been her fault.

"Happy told me," Natsu admitted with a shrug and she made a mental note to throttle the interfering cat at some point, she had never even considered the fact that the Exceed knew what she had done or that he would tell someone else. "He also told me that you were planning on throwing yourself at it if you couldn't find some other way," he added and she blushed brightly and glanced away, surprised that there wasn't ridicule in his voice, after all it had been one of the daftest ideas she'd ever had.

"You all needed me…but I was stupid," she mumbled shamefully, and above her she heard him sigh with exasperation and then there were warm hands under her chin. With a strange gentleness he tilted her head upwards, forcing her to look at him and she was surprised to find that there wasn't even a hint of reproach in his gaze.

"You are a Fairy Tail mage, we all do and say stupid stuff. How many times have I insisted on fighting someone who was much stronger than me, even when I know I will lose? Even if you were daft to take such a risk does it make you any less brave?" He asked softly, and once again she found herself stunned by his words, not least because there was more than an element of truth in what he was saying.

"You said that you could never do what she did, leading her guild despite their differences and fears, but you already have," Natsu continued without hesitation and she blinked, this time completely confused as she knew that she had never led the guild, she was to new for that. Seeing her opening her mouth to protest he squeezed her shoulder and smiled at her. "Have you forgotten? It was you who managed to get through to everyone when they were fighting during the battle of Fairy Tail, it was your words and feelings that made them band together to fight the Thunder Palace. You convinced them all to attack those Lacrimas despite their preoccupation with petty quarrels and their fear of the body link magic."

Lucy blinked as his words settled over her, her thoughts drifting back to that moment when everyone had responded to her words. She remembered the warmth that had filled her when they had rallied, and the astonishment she'd felt when she realised that they had truly listened to her words and drawn strength from that. What was it that Cana had said? That she had more Fairy in her than anyone else, and she found her gaze drifting down to the beloved mark on her hand.

"But that wasn't leading, not like she did," she protested in the end, although for the first time she felt a gleam of belief in what he was telling her. In response to her words he rolled his eyes, and for the first time she detected a hint of exasperation in his expression.

"So?" He asked simply, and she frowned in confusion at the question. She might be slowly starting to believe his words, but surely even he could see the differences between the situations. "That Lucy was living in a different world, with a completely different Fairy Tail than ours. She lead in that situation, it didn't mean that she could've rallied our Fairy Tail in the same way as you did; same as you would've lead her guild in a different way if you'd been in her shoes." She frowned in thought as she considered his words seriously, realising that he was right that she and Edo-Lucy were in completely different situations.

FT

"Strong? You are one of the strongest people I know," Natsu said more softy this time as he moved onto her next point, kneeling in front of her, olive eyes warm as he met her gaze, grasping her hands as she moved to shake her head. "You survived everything that your father threw at you, and you found your resolve to face him and tell him the truth. You know, I'm not sure that I'll be able to say everything I need or want to, to Igneel if he come back?" His voice wavered slightly, and this time it was Lucy who reached out and squeezed his hands, stunned by his confession. Natsu was never afraid to say what was on his mind (apart from when Erza was in a bad mood, but that was different), and to hear that a little part of him feared a reunion that he longed for with all his heart shocked her.

"I don't believe that for a second," she said firmly and he blinked at her, hearing the certainty in her voice as she continued. "If I could do it to a father than barely knew me, you can definitely do it with a Father that loved you with all his heart." She had never met Igneel, and the only impression she had was from the little that Natsu had given away in his fleeting mentions of the Dragon that had raised him, but she couldn't imagine anyone not loving Natsu.

"How can you have so much faith in my strength, but not your own?" Natsu asked with a weak laugh and she pretended not to notice as he blinked away suspicious moisture from his eyes, and she found herself smiling as well realising the irony in her actions.

"Because you are strong," she said simply as though it explained everything, and in her mind it did. Even when he was beaten or injured he never gave up, not on himself and not on his nakama, and he gave them all strength just by being himself. The amount of times she had wanted to run away or hide during a battle where she knew that she was completely outmatched, but his determination and courage had always given her the strength to stand and fight.

"And so are you," he said just as simply, and she blinked at him in astonishment feeling a faint blush spreading across at her cheeks. "Your strength might be different to mine or Edo Lucy's, bout ours is different to everyone else. Everyone in Fairy Tail has something that gives them strength and courage, sometimes it can be as simple as believing in the guild; other times it can be trying to outgrow something in your past, or achieving a set goal." This time his words resonated with her and she smiled at him as a feeling of peace swept over her, and the insidious doubts gave way beneath the warmth of his words and she realised just where her strength came from.

"It's you," she whispered sounding surprised, but as she thought about she realised that she wasn't really surprised. She had always known that he was the source of her strength and courage, she just hadn't admitted it to herself or anyone…else. Her eyes widened with realisation as it dawned on her that she had just told Natsu, and her flush grew in intensity.

"You're my strength as well," she nearly missed his quiet words because she was lost in her thoughts, but as it registered what he was saying, her head shot up and she stared up at him. Heat flooded her as she found that he was staring at her with warm eyes, although she was relieved and amused to find that he was blushing almost as much as she was. "I mean…" He coughed and trailed off, his blush only increasing and she giggled at the sight.

Summoning her courage she got to her feet, pulling him gently back to his feet before glancing up at him only to find him staring at her with an odd expression.

"What?" She asked feeling self-conscious all of a sudden under his scrutiny, and she shifted nervously from side to side when he didn't look away. After another moment he blinked and looked away for a second, an almost shy expression flickering across his face and she frowned in confusion wondering just what was going through his mind. Before she could question him though he moved, and she let out a brief startled noise as suddenly overly-warm lips were pressing against hers. For a moment she froze torn between escaping and giving in, but the warmth drew her in and she pressed closer to him as she began to respond.

FT

Eventually they pulled back, both of them sporting matching blushes and soft smiles, and without protest Lucy allowed the Dragon-Slayer to pull her back against his chest. She couldn't stop the small noise of contentment that escaped as she allowed herself to bathe in his heat, half-heartedly hitting his arm when he chuckled at the noise.

"Ow," he whined in protest but made no move to release her, instead nuzzling against her head with a happy sigh as he breathed in her scent.

"We're going to have to go back in soon," Lucy said softly, reluctant to interrupt the moment but knowing that their nakama would soon notice that they were missing if they hadn't already. She didn't want to cause them concern, especially on a night of celebration…she tensed slightly as she recalled the reason why they were celebrating, recalling Mira's story of what Natsu and Lisanna had been like when they were younger, and wondering just what their relationship would be now that she was back.

"What is it?" Natsu had noticed the sudden tension and she could hear the worry in his voice, and she bit her lip in irritation, she hadn't wanted to worry him again.

"It's nothing," she replied after a long moment, knowing that her thoughts were being foolish and deciding that she had already caused him enough concern with foolish thoughts and questions today. She looked up and smiled at him as she saw the worry in his eyes as he studied her. "Really, its nothing," she repeated and after a moment he relaxed and nodded, accepting her words at face value although she could tell that he was still a little doubtful.

"Come on then, we should go back to the party," he said cheerfully and she nodded reluctantly, pulling back against his hold to indicate her readiness to go. With a small smile he let her go for a second before grasping her hand and pulling her back to him, stealing a quick kiss before stepping back with a cheeky grin. "Come on," he repeated gently tugging on her hand, leading her back up to the door and she followed him willingly with a laugh at his childlike excitement.

FTFT

Erza smiled slightly as she saw the pair slip back inside, although her eyes narrowed as she saw the faint signs that showed Lucy had been crying, wondering if she did need to clout Natsu after all. However, as she continued to watch Natsu turned back with a bright grin and grasped Lucy's hand with a gentleness very few knew he possessed and Lucy's expression melted into a warm smile which resulted in the dragon-slayer blushing slightly before pulling her after him as he set off through the still brawling crowd.

"Lucy-san looks happier," Wendy commented innocently and Erza turned to smile at the youngest dragon-slayer, exchanging knowing looks with Carla who smothered a giggle as Wendy looked between them in confusion.

FTFT

So yeah…random plot bunny that has been bugging me for a while, and my first venture into NaLu.


End file.
